Jay's Journal

Richard Munson  Jay, sounds like you have it in hand. Sometimes i think we ask too many questions and overthink things. I am guilty of that at times. You cover the basics which you have and then you go with the flow. As you get closer to feb. 15th, you will feel more on edge. All i can say is, its normal. I have a wife and a wonderful dog and 3 kids to lean on but in reality, its really you and you alone you have to live with. All the pre op i did on my own, due to covid so my wife became only eye candy anyway . Lol. You got this. Whatever you do to keep busy before heart surgery became an issue, do more of it. Hard not to think about it completely. I like to say its the elephant in the room.

Marie Myers  If any of your family live nearby, is it possible they could just stop by daily for the first week home? I think it would be good, if just for moral support. That and reaching things on the upper shelves of your cabinet...(-:

Jay Gardner  Thank you for the kind words and encouragement. Overthinking comes too easily, sometimes. You're right, in the end it's up to us and am I doing the best I can. I've been cleaning this morning to occupy my thoughts. Putting essentials on the kitchen counter. Amazing how many things weigh more than 5 pounds and are up in the cabinets. :-)
It's also my 63rd birthday, today. A good day! My daughter does live fairly close and is going to come by everyday on her way to work, so I'm really not alone at all. I did also get a MedAlert just in case. It's supposed to detect falls. I worry, but also I'm excited. So glad they found the tumors before an incident and that the prognosis is good. Just need those little guys to hold on until the surgeon can remove them and hook me up with a new AV. Many blessing!

Martin Smith  Hello Jay,
63. Happy birthday!
I'm not in your shoes, but I am your age, plus 5 mos., and I had OHS 16 mos. ago. I'll add to the excellent comments above: you will persevere and you will feel relief soon after your operation. Your heart and your body, imperfections and all, are probably tougher than you think. Hang in there and know that others are thinking of you and wishing you excellent outcomes.

Richard Munson  Happy birthday jay. We have one of those extended doo hickies they used to use in the grocery stores when i was a kid to grab cans off the upper shelves. You squeeze the handles. I had the same issue even with a wife at home ( her being a shortie) and it worked. Not for 5 pounds however. Falling: personally i think the easiest place to fall is in the shower and i recommend being very careful the first couple of weeks. Its slippery and you are weak and it is exhausting. Yes, exhausting. You will find out. Shower seat, hand wand all help. Our shower is in the tub so getting over the edge can be a task. Maybe good time to wash up while daughter is visiting.

Jay Gardner  Everyone here is amazing. I've had a great day. Thanks for the shower seat idea and grabber thingy. It's been mentioned that patience is important, especially in early recovery. I've been using my Fitbit meditation and breathing app to remember to be kind to myself. Again, thank you all for sharing with me. Every word means so much.

Rose Madura  Happy Birthday Jay. I do wonder if your daughter would be able to stay with you for the first couple of days. Until you feel confident about everything. And be sure to have phone nearby if you need to call anyone. Shower chair...yes and Richard had a good idea fo take shower when your daughter is there. Best wishes and please keep us posted.

  Happy Birthday Jay and wish you many, many more and in good health. You will be just fine. Stay strong and pray a lot. After coming home my daughter had to go back to work and I was by myself all day. She assisted me on my first shower but after that I was able to do it all by myself but always when she was home. Remember to keep all the things you will be using on a daily basis on the counters and easy to reach. You should have meals prepared ahead of times and freeze them so you can warm them up when you get hungry in the stove or microwave. Don’t lift more than 5 pounds and if you get sleepy at odd hours just sleep as that is one of the hardest things to do in the first few weeks after surgery. Walk when you can, I started in the house and progressed to outside and walking back. It’s going to be one day at a time. Call your doctor if you don’t feel right, don’t wait. God bless you. Remember we will be here to welcome you into recovery. You are not alone.

Deena Z  Hi Jay, happy birthday!! I had my open heart surgery through the sternum last year, when I was 64. Pretty close in age. And still youngish:). Rose has a good point about having your daughter stay with you for the several days or vice versa. It will be much easier and safer than a morning stop over. Actually, easier for both of you. No reply needed. But something to seriously think about.

Lisa Coombe  While I was waiting for surgery I found a t shirt that said “you got this” . I was only 42 when I had surgery last year but I was lucky to meet a wonderful man who had been through what I was waiting to go through and I’m greatful every day to have him in my life, this time last year I was looking at going through surgery on my own soi know the feeling going through

Susan Lynn  Happy Birthday, Jay! 🥳🎂🎶 Just to add to the great advice you've already received, think about something special you'd like to do in late March. Having a goal will keep you looking ahead and your spirits up. Before you know it, you'll stop counting the weeks since your surgery and it will be just a distant memory - complete with the heart pillow souvenir. You'll be surprised at your resilience. You can do this! We'll be here every step of the way! ❤

Brady Busch  The biggest thing for me to deal with,after surgery,was the exhaustion,especially for about the first five days,I couldn't even wipe my own rear end.Glad the nurses were understanding and helpful.
After being discharged on Thanksgiving Day,I stayed at a hotel,near my home,for two weeks,because of an accessible shower and more room to walk,down the hallways.Now,I'm about two weeks into rehab and feeling much better,than two months ago.

Richard Munson  Jay, i was worried about telling you i bought a special seat for the toilet with a pair of handles on either side to stand up easier but now i’m going for it after reading brady post. It raises you up a few inches. I like it so much i kept it. I’d post a picture of it but maybe not. TMI. Use your imagination and amazon . Com

Rose Madura  I was 59 and chose a tissue valve. I did not want to be on coumadin. I did research, discussed with my surgeon and my brother who is a doctor. Both of whom, along with my husband, helped me decide. It was one of THE most difficult decisions of my life. It's not easy at all. I realize I most likely will need a TAVR in the future. That was all part of the decision making process for me. But remember this, no matter what you choose, it's the right choice for you. Make a decision; go with it and don't look back.

Tom Everson  Hi. I have a tissue valve and I expect a lot more years than 10 to 12 , but only the lord knows Good luck and as Rose said DON’’T LOOK BACK ON YOUR DECISION

Louise Moore  Hi Jay, I'm 67 and will be having valve replacements in Feb. My thinking is like yours and I want a tissue valve now because as it ages and needs replacement, a TAVR procedure is readily available and who knows what other advancements will be in play by then. I'm on Warfarin now and would love for that to be short term, not forever. I'm very careful to have the same amount of arugula at dinner every night just to keep my INR steady. It's also a possibility that you can hear the clicking sound of a mechanical valve and personally I love music too much to become a human metronome.

Jay Gardner  Thank you all so much for sharing your experience and encouragement. I look forward to sharing my journey with this amazing family. I'm very grateful. I didn't realize how alone I was feeling. I have a loving family that I adore, but being able to connect with you gives me a special strength.

Ginny Turner  Hi Jay and welcome. You may have seen the post about Adam's webinar on aortic valve surgery today at 6 pm EST. It's the first post on the patient news feed, where you can register for the event. Best wishes as you make these decisions!

Brady Busch  Hi Jay,My age is 66 and made the decision,to use a tissue valve,because of the blood thinner thing.A cardiologist told me,they can put a valve in valve in valve.Yes,that's three.Mine was done on 11/16,along with mitral repair.