Whitney's Journal

Kate Watson  Were you able to do cardiac rehab at all? I am hoping that will give me some strength back because I've lost muscle strength big time. Sorry to hear your transition back has been rough. Is there any way to do something more clerical within hospice, more on the paperwork end? Well I wish you the best of luck in finding a better working situation!

Jean Raber  Whitney, bless you for your hospice work. Are you able to afford cardiac rehab? I know that sometimes finances require folks to get back to work ASAP, and that means foregoing optimal recovery time. You are in my prayers!

Rita Savelis  It does take awhile (months) to get your strength back, cardio rehab or no cardio rehab. Going back to work is a slow process. It's a good idea to start part time for example if you can. 3 patients is an okay start for your first week. You will improve. You have to get used to the new environment of being back at work. And yes, bless you for your hospice work.

Tracy Simmons  Hi Whitney. That is noble work that you do and I hope you can continue if that is what you want to do. I have an office job and had minimally invasive surgery and by Wednesday or Thursday am wiped out. I had read some of your posts earlier and was wondering how you're doing. Best of luck to you.

Kate Watson  Nice to hear from you, Whitney. Glad things are going well for you. Hope your boy is doing good and good luck back at work!

Rita Savelis  The low energy is not your fault. It's just what post-surgery is like for a long time. The energy will come back but it takes time.

Sophia Ridley  So glad to hear that you're moving in the right direction and also that you got a repair.
How's your son bearing up? Are you getting lots of help? Hope your recovery progresses in leaps and bounds!

Whitney Nelson  Thank you Sophia! My son is fine, keeping me on my feet. I had a lot of help the first few weeks after surgery but I'm pretty much on my own now but my family is only a phone call away if I need them😊

Emily Rowley  I'm glad to hear you are doing well now 😊 It's great they could repair instead of replace your valve, will you need another Op (hopefully not) down the road? I think back to Pre-Op I was like you full of anxiety & uncertainty, bet you feel relived now? I'm happy to hear you are starting to feel more like yourself again. 😁 How's Cardiac Rehab?

Whitney Nelson  Emily, no cardiac rehab for me. My surgeon said I may have to have a replacement down the road in like 20 years but he would go in through my leg and do tissue valve. He didn't think he would ever have to crack me open again! Lol!! Thank the good Lord!!

Emily Rowley  With technology and techniques progressing that's great news! 😃 What happens to your existing valve and did he say why it may need replacing/won't last forever? I will continue to pray good health for you. 🙏 How come no Cardiac Rehab?

Wanda Mroz  In 20 years with the advancements... Who knows how much easier this would be! Glad you are doing well... Wonderful! I'm curious... Why no rehab? Have a wonderful Easter! 💞💐🐣🐰✝

Steven A Husted  i love your post about prayer being very important for surgery and recovery our heavenly father will take care of his children if we just ask amen

Whitney Nelson  I'm not sure why no rehab. It was just never mentioned and honestly I don't really feel like I need it but I will see if I'm saying the same thing once I try going back to work. Lol.

Kate Watson  That is awesome to hear, Whitney. So glad you are doing so well ! You've been a positive inspiration to those of us in the waiting period :)

Elaine Cutri  I like emoji! Taking it easy tomorrow sounds like a great idea! Don't worry about today, you'll be back to your crazy schedule soon enough. I know I am. Best wishes!

Clare Auten  First of all, how great that you are feeling good enough to be out that long! Secondly, I think we all did that, overdid the activity before we were ready. Take it easy today and you will be ready to do that again in no time.

Elaine Cutri  Hang in there Whitney! Getting out is good, but it's an adventure at this point. Best wishes for a continuing smooth recovery.

Jean Raber  God, shopping. You are a brave woman. Linda, depression is often part of the landscape for any heart surgery. Trauma releases all kinds of weird chemicals in your body that make you feel sad or angry. I'm sure there's a better technical explanation, but that's it in a nutshell. It does get better.

Jackie Owens  I called it PTSD vs Depression, but yes, I had the "blues" for a couple months. It gets better once the pain subsides and your brain lets go of the trauma that you just experienced. Now, at 6 months post op it's almost like it never happened. I don't even really think about it anymore. :)

Wanda Mroz  You will feel normal again. Give yourself time to heal! This is a big surgery... An invasion of a major organ and it takes time to bounce back. You seem to be on track and doing just fine! It will get better slowly but surely! Hugs

Barbara Laurie  Whitney, I love your scrappy attitude to be mentally ready to go, but remember when you left work and were like," hey, these people don't get that this surgery is a BIG DEAL!" Well, now your body is saying, " hey, doesn't she get this was a big deal!?" I didn't even think I would feel normal after my EP study and ablation, but, 4 weeks later, I finally do! (Oi!) so, Wanda and the gang know, give yourself some time off.. Do what your aftercare directives are and enjoy YOU! (And that cutie pie son!) Phillipians 4:6-8 Don't be anxious, but with thankfulness ,let your requests be known to God.. And the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your heart and your mind in Christ Jesus. 💕💖💕 You make me think of a new foal, wobbly legs but a big heart ready to run like the wind! You will. Just not now. 😄

Christine Oliva  I would take a nice warm shower---help relax my back muscles, turn off the lights, get my water cup nearby, super soft blankets and, low surround sound music. I have to hand it to my two teenagers who knew my bedtime was 7:30pm sharp and everyone had to be very quiet. Also took a whole pain pill with something warm. As the days passed I found I needed less preparation to sleep so don't worry it will come. It took me about three-four weeks to sleep comfortably and from there the progress really moved fast. I think its a combination of chronic pain, anxiety and just your body adjusting to the trauma. We know it sucks, most of us have been there but there is a bright light at the end of your tunnel. Hang on Kiddo its around the corner.

Mary K  I use Monroe Institute's "Super Sleep" .mp3. Works like a charm. Or if you do not want to spend $20, Technomind has .mp3's on Amazon for a 89 cents. Ultra Sleep System is one. You have to listen to either through headphones.

susan kotansky  Yesss!!! Mornings are the worst. Even though I'm almost at five months, mornings are still the worst. I find myself not wanting to get out of bed however, the remedy is moving. Once I'm up and about there is much improvement. And TIME and patience. It will get so much better. And yes...sleep is hard. I still have trouble sleeping and staying asleep. I've used tapes, making the room cold and cuddling under a big warm down comforter. I just keep seeing that time is the great healer. All these things have gotten a lot better, even though I still experience them. I wish you a great night's sleep and a sunny pain free morning!!!

Elaine Cutri  Have you tried either cold or hot packs? I also found a (very gentle and short) massage to help ease pain and muscle spasms.

Shirley Wong-Cruz  Hi Whitney, in my case I used to have my husband massage my shoulder blade area with regular body cream. Eventually that pain will disappear. Good luck!❤️

Wanda Mroz  I had that and still do on and off. Try hot pack or cold... I also used a tennis ball up against my back and rolled it back and forth on a wall. That helped relieve the knots also.

Kelly Weisgarber  I agree massage helped a bit, I was surprised about how much pain I had in my shoulder blades, and my collar bones, more so than the incision area. It gets better. Good luck.

Kate Watson  Oh no so sorry to hear it. I had quite a lot of trouble with nausea and vomiting after my surgery. I remember I had to switch to only extra strength tylenol at some point. Maybe try some plain yogurt (no sugar) and swish it around in your mouth, it should help heal the thrush. Maybe you can also mix the potassium pill with some yogurt or applesauce. I hope you feel better asap!

  SO sorry, Whitney! Not sure if you can crush it and put in pudding, but chocolate pudding was one of the few things I actually wanted after I left the hospital. I can't imagine throwing up so soon after surgery. I am sorry! Hang in there!

Gail Magnus  Whitney I had thrush, too...it SUCKS! I recommend Popsicles...they helped me a lot and they probably won't make you throw up!? The rinse helps w/the thrush...it took a good 48 hours to feel a lot better. I'm not recommending the Popsicles for the potassium...more for the thrush. But maybe if your throat is nice and cold it will be easier to swallow the potassium. Sorry to hear you are sick...can you get some oral zofran?

Cathy Slipski  I'm sorry your not feeling good. That potassium pill is so big and I almost choked a few times taking it. I cut mine into 4 pieces and take it with pudding. That works for me. Hope your getting bettet!!

Gail Magnus  Whitney, I came home on a Saturday and that Monday (two days later) was HORRIBLE!!! After that hurdle (or hurdles I should say) every day got a little easier and continues to. Hang in there.

Alina FH  Whitney, I have a childhood friend who cannot swallow pills either, she crushes them and puts them in a spoonful of either yogurt, or sour cream (she loves eating that straight up) or pudding. She just takes one big swallow of whatever is in the spoon with the crushed meds in it and she chases it with water. I hope you get better!

Whitney Nelson  Gail! Yes! It hurts so bad!! My mouth is gross. I called right when I noticed and called the doctor and got the swish and swallow but I will definitely try that since I can't take pain meds anymore.

Barbara Laurie  Whitney, you and your son have been in my prayers, I already take the potassium (2pills) daily, and it never gets easier with thrush (which I had 4 times last year😳) everyone's suggestions here are terrific, so just wanted you to know, you're never alone, and hopefully you can try these ideas. Praying you'll feel Stronger and well daily. But don't compare yourself to others,we are all just regular people like you, having to face adversity, thankfully with Adams web site here, we get to share! I think YOU'RE the hero kiddo, I do. So here's a {{{hug}}} 💖 And a frog 🐸 Hope that makes you smile. Best Regards

Gail Magnus  Whitney the other thing I forgot to mention....my throat hurt after the surgery and I thought (as did the nurses/docs) it was due to the breathing tube irritation. It wasn't until I started weaning off the heavy pain meds that I noticed my throat really hurt and something wasn't right. The strong cocktail of narcotics was masking just how much my throat/tongue/etc hurt. Does that make sense? I finally looked at my tongue when I was brushing it...ewwww....yuck. I sucked on Halls a lot and that helped my throat, too.

Christine Oliva  I concur with Steven above, I sat up a lot. Plus walk, walk and walk. I was walking for 5 minutes 3 times a day and my doctor told me No!, walk 20 minutes 2-3 times a day. I know it seems a lot, but it worked. I was told a lot of pressure is due to the trauma and liquid (cells debris) in your chest. Your tube is out so now you have to drain it yourself by walking. Believe me I know it is hard, but start slow, be very careful and don't do it if you start feeling dizzy, weak or nausea. It took me about a week to work up to my doctor's expectations. Good luck.

Mary K  Christine is right, walk several times a day, even if it is around the house. I put on some happy music with ear buds and set a timer. Almost wore a path around the downstairs of our house. I worked up my time gradually. But I would first give the surgeon or cardiologist a call to let them know this is going on.

Whitney Nelson  Thanks yall! It's raining here right now so I have made it a point to walk around the house a bunch. I've had the tightness and they say it's from having open heart but I will call if it doesn't get better in the next day or 2.

Cathy Slipski  Is it when you laying down or just resting? I found a nice hot shower on my incision actually felt good. Also alot of pillows when sleeping to prop me up worked for me and I still sleep like that

Whitney Nelson  It's when I walk. Also I threw up all my lunch😖 so I called and they said they thought the pain meds were to much for my stomach and to eat clear liquids. Throwing up after open heart surgery may be the worst experience of my life!

susan kotansky  Right after surgery I took advil 3 times a day to help with pain and pressure. It helped a lot. The pressure continued for 4 months in different places. For awhile I felt like I had a steel cage wrapped around my ribs. Then it moved up and it felt like something was grabbing my tbroat. Acupuncture really helped with this and as everyone else said..MOVEMENT. I walked alot and tried to correct my posture
Sitting up straight and trying to open up the chest area definitely made a difference. Your chest is knitting together and forcing you forward. When you're able you can start balancing tbat. I see a chiropractor too.
And somethings you just have to have patience for cause it takes your body time to heal. You just had surgery so recently..I hope you start to feel better soon...you'll see. It gets better quickly!!!!

Gail Magnus  I use ice and heat on my chest when I have tightness/pain/pressure. It helps take the edge off. The nurses suggest I do it. Throwing up is making your chest discomfort worse! :-(

Wanda Mroz  No laying flat and move. Also I'm pretty sure the throwing up is making things more sore. That moves muscles you don't know you have!

Sophia Ridley  Keep moving / upright. I found jobs that could take twice /thrice as long... Clearing the breakfast table I must have walked half mile with taking one item, then another.

Daryl McCallum  I didn't hit my mattress for a month and a half as I slept in my recliner sitting up with a little tilt. Felt allot better

Clare Auten  So glad you are going home. Don't worry about the proofreading. ....you had major surgery just a few days ago.

Melinda Queliz  Wow....what a remarkable recovery so far! Okay so I have asked everyone about this as it is my biggest fear. How bad are the chest tubes coming out? And how bad is that thing in your neck coming out? Just tell me all about it please!

Whitney Nelson  Melinda, the the swan in you neck is nothing! They break it down in the unit and I felt nothing then when they took the rest of it out the tape hurt a little but that was it. The chest tubes and pacing wires hurt a little when coming out but honestly the chest tubes are so uncomfortable and make it hard to breathe that you will want those out asap!!! The worst part in the hospital for me was throwing up the whole night after surgery. But I was so groggy that night I couldn't even open my eyes. You are going to be fine!! I promise! My biggest fear was waking up on the breathing tube which I did but I couldn't open my eyes and I just tapped whoever was sitting around me and pointed at the tube and they came and pulled it. Then I went back to sleep.

Clare Auten  So glad you made it through successfully and are already posting for yourself. Remember to take it easy, there will be good days and bad but we are all cheering for you!

Melinda Queliz  I am so happy to see you posting! I have been anxiously waiting to read it because I feel like I relate to your situation as a single mom. Keep me updated as you feel better!

Kate Watson  I was just thinking about you and wondering how you did. Do you mean you didn't need a new valve after all? So glad you are doing well!

Whitney Nelson  No new valve. He said possibly 10 20 years for that but I could do tavar. Everyone says I'm doing great. I don't really feel it so I'm just going off what they say. Thanks everybody!

Jan McClain  Yay Whitney! I too have been waiting to hear from you! Keep your positive attitude and get home soon to your adorable son! How has he coped with this?

Whitney Nelson  Melinda, you will be just fine! The first few days are awful especially with the chest tubes!! But if we can have a kid and then raise them on our own, well then we got this!

Cathy Slipski  You did it girl!! So happy your ok I was wondering when you were going to post!!! You will get stronger and stronger everyday!

Tammy Pilcher  Praying for you, Whitney. That calm you are feeling is our loving Lord's peace. I felt it too. Isaiah 41:13.

Wanda Mroz  I had that weird feeling too. I was scared, but calm somehow. It was so surreal... still is. Prayers...

Cheryl Smith  You will do great. Take meds while in the hospital on s regular basis. Use your heart pillow. Best wishes.

Cathy Slipski  Whitney you got this!!! I felt the same way. It weird the night before surgery I felt numb and just went with it. You will see. You will do great!!!

Wanda Mroz  You can do this. you are stronger than you know. You'll be on the other side soon.... And you'll be proud you got through it!

Sheila Harrison  You can do it. I was numb the night before and Wanda is right you will be proud of yourself for getting through it?

Emily Rowley  You will go through it good and come out on the other side stronger. Be nice if we all could skip some parts 😏

Gail Magnus  You will get through it like all of the rest of us! Everything you're feeling is totally normal...not that it makes it any easier or better.

Gail Magnus  Whitney I kept say THE EXACT SAME THING about it being so surreal and so crazy! It would be crazy if you DIDN'T feel this way.

Bob Fessler  When I read what they said I thought to myself, Self...they sure are insensitive. But after thinking about it a while, I think they were probably trying to be nice but just weren't very good at it. They lacked the information needed to say the right thing. Like you said, they just don't seem to get it.

Barbara Laurie  Whitney, I have found that chronically healthy people who don't know you very well say strange things that seem absurd in the face of such a stressful physical condition. Don't take it to heart, and don't take it too seriously, no they don't get it! Remember the people around you who are your true friends & family, those people who are on your side and want to help your suffering, many times I've had to remind a family member upset at the job," co-workers aren't family" even if you're with them all day, they don't love you the way real family and friends do. So ,hold your head up high when you walk out of work tomorrow and you'll see them when you see them, keep positive, it's about you now. Praying it all goes great! Best Regards🌹💕🌹

Whitney Nelson  Thanks so much Bob and Barbara! My emotions are high right now😳 but both of you are right and I shouldn't let it bother me! This is why I love this site so much!!

  Whitney, I agree with the Bob and Barbara. Don't let it bother you. People who haven't been through this (or had to face the idea of it) don't understand. Some of my family and friends acted weird before surgery. Some people distanced themselves from me and I believe that they thought I was exaggerating my issue or making it. A few folks said I didn't look sick and that I looked "ok" to them. It was really odd and made me feel unsupported. Even my husband was distant but he later told me he was just plain scared. I will say now that when I tell people why I was out (that I had heart surgery), they are all taken aback. Education is the one thing we all can provide to others. Otherwise, you worry about you and take care of you! :)

Eddie Patton  Yea, having a valve replacement doesn't register as much as some surgeries. If you have emergency bypass it gets attention, with us it is scheduled, tests are run in advance just human nature. If you fell out and rushed to surgury they would react different. If you really want to get their attention have someone send a nice pic of the aftermath of surgery! Really don't sweat it if anything use it as motivation to get back. You will need to focus on you. Good luck and fight hard.

Wanda Mroz  Yes... And after too.. Still! Then you are milking time off! I ignore those that do not get it. They don't get how big it is.

Sophia Ridley  I know it's difficult but try to ignore them. They don't have a clue what to say to you so trying to make light of it. Concentrate on you.

Kelly Weisgarber  I think people just don't know how big this is, and maybe they think they're being supportive but it can really come off as insensitive. Hang in there, don't let others comments bring you down. It's time to focus on your recovery. Good Luck to you!

Sheila Harrison  People don't get it, don't take it personally as time goes on you will start to smile at their ignorance. My favorite was Did you really get cow valves? Don't you like pig valves? I burst into laughter there was nothing I could say. Hang in there,don't let them get under your skin.

Mary K  Yes, either people don't get it, or they say something that minimalizes the situation so that they do not have to have any emotional involvement. I see the latter as a form of self protection. Find the support that you need from reliable sources, not randomly.

Melinda Queliz  Best wishes to you! I am not too far behind you with a scheduled valve repair March 3rd. I look forward to reading more about your experience and recovery as you are inspiration to me. I too am a single mom to a 7 year boy so I understand the emotions you are feeling.

Kate Watson  How is your little guy handling it? I think I wrote this to you before but my son was 11 at the time of my first surgery. I had him stay with his dad (who I wasn't with) during my surgery and part of my recovery, so that was helpful that I had that option. I hope you have lots of family support to help you both through! It will so good to put all of this past you.

Whitney Nelson  Hi Kate! Yes I remember you telling me that. He is handling great! But he also doesn't get that fact it's a major surgery and I don't push that information. He hasn't ever spent more than a night or 2 away from me so I guess that will be the real test!

Whitney Nelson  Thank you Laura!! I really wish all you girls lived close by. I feel like these past few months yall have been some of my closest friends. Thanks for all the support! I couldn't go through this journey without it!

Kate Watson  I'm glad to hear that he's handling it well! It will be a test for both of you, I'm sure, but you'll both do great!

  Sorry, Whitney! Hope you are healthy and ready for surgery on your chosen date! Hope you feel better soon!

  Hi Whitney, I can't remember if you are getting minimally invasive or full sternotomy, but I had AVR via mini sternotomy and went back part-time 6 weeks post op and started full time the following week. I am 40 and in relatively good health. I don't have a physically demanding job, but when I went back, I wasn't allowed to lift more than 10 pounds. Now, I don't have limitations listed that are out of my typical job description. You may have a restriction on what you can do which means they would probably have you doing modified work until your doctor releases you physically to lift whatever the requirements of your job have you lifting. I will say that I was supposed to go back full time at 6 weeks but had a ton of appointments and the surgeon told me I could have another week off or go back part-time (he would approve either). Just see how you feel and talk to your doctor. I will say for me, as great as it was to have extra time with my family, I was ready to go back to work. The routine is good for me (not to mention that I needed the paycheck). Best wishes to you!

Clare Auten  I am a special ed teacher. My surgeon also said 8 weeks but did the paperwork for the full 12 allowed by fmla. When I questioned it, he said that it was easier to write something and send me back early than extend the time. That being said, I ended up using 10 weeks so I could jump back in after spring break....I was ready.

Elaine Cutri  I had a 10 lbs lifting restriction for 8-10 weeks. Lifting and pulling patients is very different than lifting groceries or babies. Artie has a good suggestion. Waiting a few extra weeks is a moment in time. Ruining your surgeon's work may stay with you for a very long time. Best wishes Whitney 💝

Liz Burroughs  I went back to work full-time 6 weeks after my surgery. It was a little hard for me just because of the long hours. I have a desk job & rarely have to do any lifting. Maybe you can start back part-time & see how it goes. Listen to your body & don't do too much too soon. Maybe you can request more medical leave time in case you need it. Good luck!

Wanda Mroz  Don't rush it... This isn't something to rush through. I was off for almost 4 months and I have a desk job. It's been 5 1/2 months now and I still get tired by day's end. Your body has been through a lot of trauma. give it time to heal and get stronger.

Mark Caswell  Fast is good but not fast enough I bet. For the few horror stories you hear there really are so many more successful outcomes. I had same feelings and none of them remotely occurred. Positive thoughts make a huge difference. Think about how amazing you will feel afterwards. Good luck.

Tahiti Pearls  Stay positive Whitney! Just focus on the bright side and do not entertain horrible thoughts. Trust in yourself and your cardiac team. Everything will be fine.

Gary Stripling  This evening my wife and I were reflecting on my OHS 5 months ago tomorrow. It's so surreal how fast the time moves on after something as monumental as OHS. I actually surprised my surgeon & cardiologists by how much I knew about what they were doing to/for me after I watched OHS videos on YouTube. Maybe that wasn't such a good idea but I was prepared. And now I look back and it wasn't so bad after all! You'll be fine. I agree with the others - trust your caregivers (and listen to the nurses).

Liz Burroughs  I spent many evenings watching mitral valve repair surgeries online. I finally decided to stop doing that & get my mind on other things. I tried not to think about the surgery too much. I felt better after that.

Paige Rupe  I woke up before I was extubated and it was not at all a fun experience BUT my family was there calming me down and my doctors were doing all they could to make the process a lot quicker. I don't recall the actual extubation but I do remember a lot of time before the tube came out. Mostly it just catches you off guard, and normally the anesthesia carries a mid amnesic agent that pretty much lets you forget the whole thing whether you wake up intubated or not. I wouldn't worry about that part!!

Pat Bluemel  Stay away from Google. It's not your friend at this point:-). This site is - but try to resist researching a lot, I remember it causing me a LOT of anxiety. Don't worry about the vent and the tube, they are really non events for the most part. Focus on the goals you are going to make waking up. Sitting up, walking, spirometer, walking more and then going home.

Wanda Mroz  Been there... I never watched any videos but I read some. I stressed a LOT.. trust me I'm a worrier. I did wake up with the breathing tube... And no it was absolutely not pleasant... BUT... I lived through it as will you if that happens. Just keep calm if that's the case and know that it takes seconds to remove it and then it's gone. You can get through it. Just prepare and be calm. Don't look stuff up anymore, just relax, prepare and try to remain positive... Difficult yes... But this too shall pass.

Sophia Ridley  I was reading a newspaper article and then accidentally read about the surgery before I was ready, that was quite a shock as I hadn't really thought it through. I have a weak stomach for surgery (can't watch medic programs) so that's saved me from the videos. Research is good but I would steer away from negatives... They get airtime for the same reason the news is bleak.

Apart from this site, others I've seen are never uplifting or supportive. Thank God for here!!

Clare Auten  Good days and bad days are a common part of this crazy roller coaster you are on. Take care of yourself. Extra prayers for you.

Bob Anick  Whitney, unfortunately, that's part of this process (at least it was for me). Now that I'm done, I can't think of why I was worried. I'm sure that will not help....just be as tough as you can and face it head on...before you know it, you'll wake-up in the ICU and wonder why you worried so much too.

Whitney Nelson  Thank you Bob, it does help hearing that surgery wasn't as bad as you thought. I'm so gald it went well for you! Thank you Liz! Every prayer helps.

Wanda Mroz  I understand your feelings... And 5 months later I wonder why I worried knowing if I had to do it over I would guess what? Worry! Hang in there... It will be behind you soon.

  Completely normal. It is easy to catastrophize! Just remember the statistics are in your favor. This is such a common surgery, mortality rates are very low, especially in a person who is younger and healthy otherwise. Thinking of you and hoping you have a great day tomorrow!!

Jennifer Lorenz  We've all been there Whitney. I was soooo scared, especially because I'm my mom's caretaker. Somehow, when you get there tomorrow, you will feel easier and will be so happy when you wake up in ICU. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers tonight and can't wait to hear from you when you're recovering!

Cathy Slipski  I am feeling the exact same way. You are not alone. I go in less than 2 weeks and one day I am saying to myself let's get this done you got this and the next day I am freaking out thinking omg I have 2 weeks to live. Thinking how my kids will go on without me.... this had been an emotional roller coaster. This site has helped me so much with my anxiety. When I start to freak out I read how well others surgery went and I can calm myself down. Hang in there one day at a time.

Elaine Cutri  You're allowed. Before my surgery I was a nervous wreck. When I rode in the car with my husband. He's a good driver. I was so worried someone else might hit us. After a few reactions from me (Yikes!, Watch out!), I would get this look that told me, "I am driving defensively and safely, it's ok."
The crazy nerves and crying have gone away. Right now is the tough part. Hang in there Whitney! Sending positive thoughts and prayers your way.

Michele Tracey  Hi Whitney, I'm a mama of two kids too. I just found out I have this condition BAV with stenosis 3 months ago. I feel so scared and overwhelmed and worried about surgery and that I won't make it through! I have a huge phobia of surgeries, just my luck on this heart condition! I feel your pain, it's scary, it's out of our control, and I worry every second since I found out. I will say a prayer for you and hope that God gives you peace, grace and healing mercy with your up coming surgery. Hang in there heart sister, you are not alone! God bless you! Hugs!

Jacqueline Cook  As others have mentioned, the waiting is the worst part. Hang in there...before you know it the surgery will be behind you and you'll be on the healing side of things. Sending a big hug.

Whitney Nelson  Thanks everybody! All of the kind and encouraging words mean so much! Today is a new day and I plan to make myself have a good day!

Nancy D  For me, the most emotionally difficult time was the testing, the unknown and then the wait for surgery. I understand where you are coming from, but now 16+ month since my replacement, I can say I have done so well, and continue to move forward. You will do great post op, it's a process for sure but I found that working through the process to heal and get my strength back wasn't as emotionally draining as the wait ahead. Be gentle with yourself and allow yourself to heal, and work up your strength a bit at a time- and you will soon be up and running!
Wishing you all the best!

Lauren Burt  I too found out not from heart symptoms but just a routine check! I have kids as well and was terrified to have the surgery! I am 7 months out and fully recovered now.. And in fact feel better than ever!! Technology has come so far and heart surgery is such a common procedure anymore:) best wishes! You will do great!

Cathy Slipski  Whitney as my surgery is quiclky approaching I can't help but think the same. I find myself showing my fiance where I keep things passwords for my personal stuff and he catches me and sats stop your coming home. It's a mother's nature to worry about our kids especially when we are gonna be out of commission for a little while and someone else will be taking care of the kids. Keep busy keep your head up we got this!

  Do all those things you need to do now. I got my will, POA, spent time with my family, tied up loose ends at work, etc. The waiting just plain sucks. I hope you find peace and calm during this period!

Liz Burroughs  I'm glad that you have a surgery date! Hopefully the time will go by fast so that you can get the surgery behind you & get on with your new life (with a mended heart). Keep yourself busy, focus on your son, and try not to think about the surgery too much. I was very scared but I made it through my surgery. You will too. My thoughts & prayers will be with you.

Wanda Mroz  I was terrified as well... And frankly I didn't do some of the things I should have but I made it and am better than ever! Just breathe, try to relax and pray for tranquility. I prayed everyday for God's help. And it helped. Praying for you.

  I would do relaxation breathing when I would have palpitations and it would help. Talk to your cardiologist about any changes in symptoms to make sure there is nothing else you need to do. http://healthland.time.com/2012/10/08/6-breathing-exercises-to-relax-in-10-minutes-or-less/

Whitney Nelson  Thank you Laura. I made myself sit down and try to think rationally. I feel a bit better now but I will definitely look in to the breathing exercises!

Wanda Mroz  Try to relax and yes breathe. As a last resort if the palpitations are worrisome call the Dr. Can't hurt to ask for peace of mind. They will understand.

Emily Rowley  When I experienced stress on top of symptoms such as bad chest pains, tightening of the chest, palps I find my symptoms would heighten or I feel it more. Deep breathing, clearing the mind, reorganise & long silent hug from loved one I find help. But if you feel severe symptoms get someone close by to call for an Ambulance/emergency help!

Debbie Bentley   I'm in your shoes . I'm so torn which way to go . I have worried about the sugery So i can't magine doing it again

Whitney Nelson  It's a hard decision Debbie! I know it's has to be made but I don't think I will fully be comfortable with either decision.

Debbie Bentley   I think I'm leaning more towards the mechanical but waking up with that clicking in my body sounds like it might freak me out .

Emily Rowley  I'm in the same boat. This will be my 2nd OHS. Because of my young age I will need more Ops down the track. I've made a decision to choice a Tissue (Pig) Valve, however there is still alittle bit of doubt in my mind so I'm still keeping my options open, talking with my Surgeon again might help. What is your medical team think? I wish you all the best in your decision & your Operation. May you find peace in which ever way you go.

Emily.

Gregg Nissly  I'm almost 3 weeks post op and I went with a tissue valve because I wanted to have the next 10 to 15 years as normal as possible. But it's a different decision for me because I'm 54 years old and my youngest son is 13. So, if all goes well, by the time I need a new valve, I should be a good candidate for TAVR which should be my last.

You seem to be much younger, so the advantage of the mechanical is you have a much better chance of never having surgery again. Whereas with the tissue you could be looking at multiple OHS.

But this has to be your choice and yours only. One other thing about the mechanical is that with the newer ones, you only have to keep your INR between 1.5 and 2.0 which means less Warfarin. And they now have at home testers that are smaller than yOur TV remote and run on 9v batteries.

Good luck with your decision. Pray about it and read as much as you can.

Gregg

Clare Auten  Hi Whitney (and Debbie). Valve choice is very personal. Once you decide you need to be comfortable. In my opinion, it isn't something you can take back if you aren't satisfied. I went mechanical. I was 45 at the time of surgery. I am on warfarin. I get my INR checked every 5 weeks. They do have home monitoring but the lab has been so convenient for me that I just let them do it. I have no restrictions. I was never into extreme sports but can mow the yard, shovel snow, etc. I do watch what I eat, a little. For example, if I want a salad, I have a small one with lunch instead of a big one as my lunch. Still enjoy pasta con broccoli, beef and broccoli, etc. Just watch portions and try to cut the broccoli chunks so I can leave some on the plate. Jan 9 will be my 2 year anniversary. ....as I said no returns. .....

Brenda Miller  Hi Whitney...Greg... All I am 54yrs old and am now in the same boat on valve decision making....what to do ...

Rob Wigley  I'm fairly sure that the science of trans catheter valve repair/replacement will continue to improve, and rapidly at that. I had a horse tissue valve aortic valve replacement procedure (OHS) and hope that if/when this one wears out that they'll be able to do it trans. I also had an AAA, so that was replaced, and I think that would have required OHS regardless. I didn't want to be on blood thinners the rest of my life and have to check numbers. I ski, and though I don't ski thru trees you just never know......and I don't want to bleed out internally in case that (or something else) might happen. Just my opinion.....

W. Carter  Clare, you are just like me. I watch what I eat "a little". If I want some foods that are high in vitamin k I just have smaller portions. The biggest hassle that I have found is otc meds like ibuprofen and almost all cold medicines that you can't take. I was always an ibuprofen taker everyday for pain. You can take Claritin or Zytec which I do take for sinus problems daily with no interactions. Tylenol doesn't do anything for me so I don't take much of it unless it has codeine in it . But the upside to that is i'm not tearing my liver up with ibuprofen anymore. :-)

The inr testing for me is easy, every 4 weeks I go to the V.A. lab and let them pull blood. Then later that day the anticoagulation clinic will call me with the numbers and dosage changes if any. I don't hardly ever need any adjustments anymore, I have been stable for the last 6 months. So overall Warfarin is really not any hassle to me and i've been on it for over a year now.

To me the biggest downside to a mechanical valve is the thumping and clicking which I have almost got use to in a year. It is really not any big deal though to be healthy like I am now.

Steven A Husted  there has been so much said about mechanical valves lasting longer and that is one of the reasons i was going to go with a mechanical then i heard that the mechanical have failed also in 2 to 3 years so it may not last longer this made me look at the bovine valve it is stronger than than the pig valve and i read that one patient has had his for 31 years so i went with a cow (bovine) valve my other problem with ohs was i was just scared of heart surgery but know i am 17 months out and it was not that bad i could do it again with out any trouble the fear of a second or third surgery does not bother me know like it did before and who knows what TAVR will be like in the near future and i did not want to deal with blood thinners the rest of my life or INR testing or a bleed out this is a hard decision and it is really what you feel comfortable with there are pro and con on both valves i am 67 and very comfortable with my bovine valve and if i need another valve in 20 + years i may go TAVR or another bovine i hope this may help someone who is deciding which valve to go with

Meredith Bray  Limitations of anti-coagulants: I can't take aspirin for a headache, so i take Tylenol instead. I can't eat a whole bowl of cooked spinach, so I have a little more than I should and have a glass of wine.
Ticking? yes, and I thought to myself, "Once I hear it, I'll never be able to NOT hear it." And yes, I hear it. Sometimes it's ALL I can hear. Most times, I can't hear it at all. Ceiling fan drowns it out. Road noise in the car drowns it out. I"m trying to hear it now and i can't.
HOWEVER, whatever choice you make is the right choice for you. I was on the fence up until about 1 week before my surgery. Good luck!

Nova Bonna Tribunalo  hello whitney. One of the reasons why my husband dont want to undergo a heart surgery its because he cant imagine that he will be using a valve of an animal or a mechanical valve. He is too scared to try. He has a lot of what "ifs" in mind. I hope you you could wisely decide on this. I know it is not easy.

  I am sorry you are faced with such life altering decisions and fear around your aneurysm, Whitney, especially during the holidays. When I was finally told I needed to get my valve replaced, I was petrified too. I am 40 and have two young children. I was terrified that if something happened to me, that my family would fall apart (and it likely would have, but I couldn't live in that space). You will get through this and you will do great!! The valve choice is a very personal decision. I hope you and your surgeon are able to come up with a choice you are comfortable with. As I am sure you know, there are pros and cons to both. With mechanical, you will be tied to blood thinners, but likely won't need resurgery. With a tissue valve, you won't need blood thinners, but will nee resurgery. I personally chose a tissue valve. My reason is very personal. My father had aortic valve replacement in 2002. He died from a brain bleed due to coumadin levels being off. From what I have been told, this is a very rare occurrence. My father also had some heart damage prior to surgery and was in afib. Newer mechanical valves require lower doses of coumadin from what I was told by my surgeon. With all that being said, there is research suggesting that some people are more sensitive to coumadin than others. I figured I was more at risk of being on coumadin than others due to family history. My surgeon did not disagree with me. My aunt chose a tissue valve (can you tell this runs in my family) and she did fine. My surgeon gave me a tissue valve (cow valve) on 12/1 (three weeks ago today). I am currently taking Metroprolol and baby aspirin with the Metoprolol scheduled to be discontinued in the next month. My surgeon inserted a valve on the larger end of what would fit in my opening with the plan of me having transcatheter replacement in 10-15 years when I need resurgery. My hope is that technology will just continue to get better and by the time i need resurgery, something better will be out there. They are growing human tissue valves in labs currently. Who knows what they will be doing in the years to come. I wish you the best of luck in your decision. Just know there are people with mechanical valves that live long lives, just as there are people with tissue valves. All the best to you.

Liz Burroughs  Hi Whitney, I think you should call & get your surgery scheduled for early in the new year. That way you can get your heart fixed & move on with your life. You won't have to live with the fear & the uncertainty anymore. I was very afraid but I'm glad that I went through with my surgery when I did. I had my valve repaired so I don't have advice about your valve replacement decision (although I was going to go with a mechanical valve if necessary). I do know that putting off the surgery isn't the answer. It will only prolong the fear. It sounds like your problem isn't going to go away. Trust your doctors & surgeon. Everything will be okay. We're here for you! Take care. Liz

Whitney Nelson  Thank you so much Laura! It's definitely encouraging to see how well you are doing since your surgery!

Clare Auten  HI Whitney. I am sorry that the aneurysm has grown but I am sure you will make the right decision for you. I learned of my aneurysm on the day after Christmas. My surgery was two weeks later on 1/9/14. I chose a mechanical valve and am coming up on my 2 year anniversary. ...wow time is flying. I am 47 and have 3 kids... 13, 7 and 4 at the time of surgery.

Kimberly Biddick  You can do this!!!! I agree that you should get it scheduled ASAP. For one, the growth of the aneurysm indicates it is unstable. Also, because the sooner you get it done, the sooner you will be on the recovery side of things. As many say, worrying and waiting really is the worst part of it all. I am 6 weeks post aneurysm and valve repair and am progressing very well. Best wishes to you!!!

Wanda Mroz  I know it's scary... Been there. Big time fear! I didn't need a replacement but chose a tissue valve if I did. I didn't want the blood thinners although I was on them for 3 months as a precaution. They are gone now and my surgery was four and a half months ago. Don't delay... Get it fixed and over with while you are able to and before your heart becomes more damaged. You can do this... It's not easy but doable. I'm pretty proud of what I've been through and that I'm a survivor! You will be too!

Whitney Nelson  I am going to plan to have the surgery in February. I hate to wait and I know it sounds crazy but I am a single mother who works full time and I won't have any income while I am out for recovery. So I will have to wait till I get taxes back so that I am able to pay the bills😕. I will say if feels good to have a plan in place and closer to getting this behind me. It has ruled my life for the past 6 months!

Whitney Nelson  Kimberly, I have been following your story and it has helped so much. When you are feeling up to it I would love to talk to you about your experience.

Destini Hutchins  The best thing I have learned is to stay positive. Think about post op, find some things you would like to do, learn how to do, or places you want to see. Keep looking to how much better life will be after your all fixed up.

Emily Rowley  I know it's easy to feel nervous before hand, after you will feel relieved so much (hopefully, like I did). I remember waiting in the waiting room to met with my Surgeon for the first time-I was so nervous especially when she was running late. I kept adjusted myself, how I would sit & talk to her going over all the questions I would ask her in my head. But once I got in there and felt comfortable, I was fine 😊
Not knowing is the hardest part, he will tell you if you need it now or if your hearts good (although I suspect the first one cause you're seeing a Surgeon). Has your Cardiologist given you any clues or his thoughts? I took a few deep breathes, thought of how I'm lucky to be at a Word-Class facility with this highly experienced Surgeon (with a wacky sense of humour) before me and went on to enjoy a glass of my favourite drink after my Appointment.

I felt the same as you. I cane to find peace by accepting the fact I need it done and finding this wonderful support network here. I hope you too can find peace. When upset or frightened just think of us here praying for you 🙏

I hope & pray it all goes well for you. Please keep us updated Whitney.

Tina Maroon  I know how easy it is to feel nervous for your surgery. But I share that same with you. I had the Aortic Aneurysm surgery in June 2015. I did not have time to think about mine. But I have felt that way about other surgeries. Maybe the doc can give you some meds or something.

Steven A Husted  i agree with EMILY i knew i needed it done and my cardiologist sent me to my surgeon and three days later i had ohs then i was on the other side and in recovery and it was not all that bad best wishes and prayers for you

Whitney Nelson  Thank guys! I've actually already had one visit to the surgeon in August and he said then I was going to have to have surgery within 6 months. I guess I'm just nervous cause I think this will probably be the visit they schedule the surgery and that just makes all this so real.

Emily Rowley  It's good to have time to plan. I had to decide alot right then and there at the first Appointment with my Surgeon. Best of luck.

Liz Burroughs  Hi Whitney, good luck with your appointment! I hope everything goes well. Please keep us posted! Take care. Liz

  I'm sorry you have had to deal with that! Might be time for a second opinion with a new doc. Advocate for yourself because I have found that the system has lots of holes. When I was first diagnosed with BAV, a nurse told me over voicemail and when I called her back to ask about follow up, she told me to come back when I had symptoms. At that point I requested to speak to cardiologist and when I told him what happened, he was angry and that nurse was over the top nice to me after that. Good luck.

Mindy Currence  I agree with Laura. This is not just any surgery and if you are having these issues now, what is going to happen with surgery. They are proving you are not their primary concern. You MUST feel 100% confident they will care for you in every aspect. There are too many great surgeons out there to settle. I know you are frustrated, but you can do this!

Doran Herritt  Agree with the above. Push shove it's your life. You need to champion the process. If they don't want to help find someone who will. U.S. News publishes a list of best doctors and heart hospitals. Also there's a list on this sight. All are top notch. Take care. Drn

Tammy Pilcher  Whitney, I agree with everyone above. Also, if you have a number for calling to check with your insurance company, I would do that just to make sure that's really the hold up. It shouldn't take that long for them to approve your tests. My CT and heart cath were the next week after my first cardiologist appt. I remember they knew my insurance had approved the tests by the next day, because that's when they were able to schedule my tests. Praying for you to get some answers soon, heart sister. God bless!

Clare Auten  Sorry this process has been so long and frustrating. I agree with others. See if you can find out the hold up yourself. With your aneurysm, they should be approving the tests right away.

Daniel Spurgeon  There have been multiple times in my career as a professional patient that I've had to advocate for myself, both with the VA and private providers. I am polite but insistent, and I don't accept inquiry blockers such as "That's just the way it is" or "It's always been done that way."

Jean Knappik  Yes, sometimes when your temperature is increased with a fever, your HR goes up...so try and keep that under control and see what happens

Elaine Cutri  Call your doctor if you haven't already. I think the B/P is much more critical than heart rate. Hope you can get things settled down soon.

Kimberly Biddick  I have been told that BP is what we want to keep in check more than heart rate. Definitely call your doctor and ask his/ her advice on it though. I hope you get to feeling better ASAP, the flu is NO fun!!!

Elaine Cutri  I'm sorry to hear your symptoms are getting more severe. Do you family or friends to help your son? It sounds like you have a smart and caring Doctor. I'll keep you and your sons in my prayers.

Mary K  Hi Whitney, things went very fast at the end before my surgery for me, too. I was in and out of the ER. Ask your doctor when you should go to the ER.

Sending prayer for you and your son. This too shall pass

Jean Raber  Yes, call your doc's office and ask what symptoms should send you to the ER. Usually they'll tell you that if you have any increased incidence or intensity of your symptoms, go. As a parent, you're used to ignoring your own symptoms, but now is not the time to do that. I know you said that your support system is not the best, and while this site can provide some distance moral support, sounds like you need real live help. You might start with your son's school or co-workers, and parents of your son's friends. People can be very kind when they understand what your situation is. I am praying for you, my friend. Please keep us posted.

Jackie Owens  I was also in and out if ER prior to my surgery for runs of vtach and increased heart rate. It got so bad that my surgeon moved my surgery up a month. Now, 5 weeks post op I feel better but it's still a long recovery. You'll feel a ton better after surgery . Good luck!

Liz Burroughs  Take care of yourself, listen to your body & do what your doctor says. It's good that you didn't ignore your symptoms. Do your best to stay calm...everything will be okay. I'll be praying for you.

Jackie Owens  I was still out of it when they took the tube out of me. According to my husband I was awake, but thankfully don't remember it. My setback from the tube is I have some vocal cord damage which I'm still working through at 4 weeks post op. That was my biggest fear....remembering the breathing tube....which didn't happen. Hopefully that will be the case for you as well. Good luck!

Bob M  It was great that I knew about it. My wife was prepared. When it was time to take the tube out, they lowered the lights and reduced my sedative dosing. My eyes opened and saw my wife and my nurses in my room. I felt safe. Within seconds, the nurse told me to turn my head, the tube was taken out, and it was gone. It was not a problem for me because I was prepared and my wife was prepared too. Thank you to our community and Adam Pick.

Clare Auten  I consider myself overweight too. The tube was not a problem for me. I know they removed the tube the night of surgery but I was still sedated that I can't honestly remember that anymore at all.

Rita Savelis  I thought a lot about that tube beforehand too, but then it was just taken out, no problem. One is pretty out of it (sedated, morphine, after effects of long term anasthesia) after surgery so less aware of things. At this point there is no reason to think that you should have any problems with your tube...

Whitney Nelson  Thanks everyone for the information! It helps so much! I can't describe how thankful I am to have this site, it has helped so much to calm my fears!

Ginger Marine  I had had a bad experience on another surgery with a breathing tube (had to have it because I was paralyzed for 12 hours or so, so I was awake with it in place all that time) and I was worried about it. But really, it was a very small part of the whole thing. It helped that my daughters stood with me for a good while and held my hand and I felt pretty relaxed and safe--I knew I was being watched over in every way. Try to be relaxed and sure about it--it is a part of the surgery but you will be encircled with love and watchful care.

Betsey Osgood  Funny, I'm day 12 post op and I just asked my husband "Was I awake when they took out the tube"? I remember it being there but not being taken out or bothering me at all! Happy healing ~ not as bad as I had envisioned!!!

Jean Raber  My mother was awake with the breathing tube. It was not awful; just frustrated her because she couldn't talk. Taking it out didn't hurt at all. She was fine. You will be, too.

Gerald Schaffer  I was concerned also but I don't remember too much about it. I remember them asking me to take some deep breaths to make sure I could breath on my own and shortly after the tube was removed. They told me to cough and next thing I knew it was out.

Terry Shermeister   Hi Whitney: FYI--I do not remember the breathing tube at all. My friends and son remember it. Of course, one friend took a picture of me with the tube in but I will not look at it, and do not give permission for them to show others. It was a non-issue.

Steven A Husted  hi whitney i am overweight to and i barely remember them taking the tube out i remember them telling me to breath and then after to cough but i was still doped up and did not feel very much going on then i remember asking the nurse when were they going to start and she said you are all done and i dozzed off between the pain meds and sedation you will do just fine the thing that gave me just a little pain was them pulling out the drain tubes but even that only lasted a few seconds best wishes and will keep you in my prayers your heart brother steve (popeye)

John Lyons  I am also young, but not overweight. The tube bit I don't remember and am happier for it. From what I was told by the nurses due to my age I was breathing on my own before I even got out of the OR. Best wishes!

Shirley Turner  Hi Whitney you need to get to your GP and tell him your symptoms so he can examine you and let your cardiologist know. My husbands first symptom that something was wrong was that he passed out for a few minutes while using the toilet. In the middle of the night. Please take care...Hugs Shirley.

Meredith Bray  They sure sneak up on us, don't they? Our bodies are amazing machines that are constantly adapting to physical changes that we don't even notice. I promise you that after surgery and a bit of recovery, you'll look back and find a dozen times when you were experiencing symptoms and didn't realize it. Science is a beautiful thing!
-Meredith